Lando Calrissian

Haikuesday: Cloud City

Anoat Sector
Gas giant on the Ison
Home to Cloud City


Lord Ecclessis Figg,
Creator of Cloud City.
Maintained from EU.


Mining colony;
Casino in Bespin’s sky;
Cloud City has wealth!!!


Famous casino:
Pair O’Dice…no, I did not
just make this place up.


Planning to visit?
City climate is controlled,
wear what you want to!


Rey’s Survival Guide –
Cloud City postcard in it
says: “Wish You Were Here”

Haiku Addendum:
That’s right, tourists can purchase
Cloud City postcards.

Haiku Addendum:
That’s right, post-stamped mail is used
in the Star Wars “verse.”


Bespin’s Tibanna,
the gas used in “drives,” “turbos.”
Hot commodity!!!


Tibanna Supply,
disrupted by mining droids.
Sir Corto seeks help.


Carbonite frozen
Tibanna is easy to
galactically ship.


Han Solo lowered.
Leia shouts, “It will be cold!”
“I know,” he responds.


Image and music.
Vader is pure evil when
Solo is frozen.


The City’s Baron
Lando Calrissian, one
handsome looking man.


The Admin’s Palace,
home to the City’s Baron.
A Battlefront Map!!!


Apex Overlook,
luxury plaza in the
heights of Cloud City.


If you’re Apex bound
you’ll probably see Nobles
who are exiled.


Noble Court member
Elenzia trains allies
at the Overlook.


Lounge for the wealthy,
the Paradise Atrium.
Voras hangs out there.

Haiku Addendum:
Voras the Hutt, leader of
Ivax Syndicate.


The Shadow Market,
home to shadowy figures
such as the Kouhun.


Working in the clouds,
Ugnaughts do grueling labor
and play with droid heads.


I have to be frank:
I like the Bespin Wing Guard
uniform design.

Haiku Addendum:
If ever I cosplay I’ll
be a Bespin Guard.


Elayah Mordu,
a former Wing Guard member.
She freelances now.


I’m a big fan of
the Storm IV Twin-Pod Cloud Car.
One hella cool ship.


Skywalker takes a
sky walk and learns about his
sky walking father.

I can’t help but think
that Rey’s Cloud City postcard
is a subtle hint…

If right, I’ll say this:
Yes, YES, my brain is better
than everybody’s!!!!!!!!


Hanging upside down
from the City’s bottom side
is really unsafe.


In the City’s bowels,
Owacchi’s betrayers live.
Vile pirate scum.


Following Endor,
an Iron Blockade locks down
City and Sector.


The Iron Blockade,
led by Adelhard and Bragh.
Their own “Empire.”


Destroyer orbits.
Captain Tystel seeks help to
Protect Cloud City.


Name: Kars Tal-Korla,
well-known local miscreant.
Scourge of Cloud City.


Hired by Lobot,
“The Scourge” captures Borgin Kaa,
Imp sympathizer.


A Broken Blockade.
New Republic and Wing Guard
work to clear out Imps.


Lando with Lobot,
the friends discuss victory
and a baby gift.


Haikuesday is a monthly series on The Imperial Talker, a new post with poetic creations coming on the first Tuesday of each month. The haiku topic is chosen by voters on Twitter so be sure to follow @ImperialTalker so you can participate in the voting. Now, check out these past Haikuesday posts:

Droids (February 2017)

Ahsoka Tano (March 2017)

Darth Vader (April 2017)

The Battle of Scarif (May 2017)

The Truce at Bakura (June 2017)

Queen Amidala (July 2017)

Ryloth (August 2017)

Imperial Profile: Moff Ssaria

Making her only canonical appearance in the first issue of the Lando comic series, Moff Ssaria, Imperial Governor of the Castell sector, is nothing more than a minor character who helps (re)establish Lando Calrissian as the scoundrel we know him to be. When the issue begins, Calrissian is standing in Ssaria’s bedroom admiring a valuable piece of art. Intent on stealing the item from Ssaria, Calrissian instead uses his infamous smooth-talking flattery, admitting his intentions to the Moff and then talking his way out of being shot when she pulls a blaster on him. Showing his remorse, acknowledging that things got “complicated” with her and that he couldn’t just take the item and leave her, Calrissian appeals to Ssaria’s humanity to save his skin and, more importantly, convince her to give him the priceless art.

And the gamble pays off. Only a few short pages later, we find Lando explaining his actions to his close confidant Lobot, the art in hand to help payoff their debts. Pressed by Lobot about the risks he took to retrieve the art, that he could have taken it from Ssaria and left, Calrissian acknowledges the reason for his drawn-out relationship with the Moff: because of her reputation as the “Fiend of Castell.”

It is actually during his earlier exchange with Ssaria, as she lies half-naked in bed, when Calrissian uses the term “Fiend of Castell.” As he notes, it is a term “they” – the population she governs – use to describe her. He also states that she is called “The Burning Moff” and mentions that she is “brutal in your [her] response to even the slightest challenge to the Empire’s authority.” Given Ssaria’s penchant for swift, violent reprisal, it is little wonder Calrissian played a long-con, intent on securing the work of art by appealing to her humanity – stating that he knows the “real her” – to ensure that he would not have the so-called “Burning Moff” hunting him down. 

ssaria
Lando and Ssaria discuss her reputation as the “Fiend of Castell.”
Photo Credit – Star Wars: Lando, Part I

Fortunately, while we the reader are introduced to her reputation by Lando, we are also privy to a small inkling of the way Ssaria views herself. Or, more specifically, the way she views her authoritative position within the Imperial hierarchy. In response to what “they” say about her, Ssaria states that she is but “an extension of the Emperor’s will. My actions here simply execute his directives.”Indeed, as the Imperial Governor of the Castell sector, Moff Ssaria carries out the wishes and desires of the Emperor whom she serves, her orders and commands a reflection of the greater cause of Empire. In this regard, Ssaria is no different than Grand Moff Tarkin, Grand Admiral Thrawn, or Darth Vader, executing Imperial justice on behalf of the Emperor to whom they have sworn allegiance.

Continuing the theme of service to the Empire, Ssaria re-frames her violent reputation in a fascinating way, stating that “the Emperor is the mind. I am his tool. Is a tool responsible if it is used to kill someone?” With this play on words, Ssaria jettisons any moral culpability in the death of innocents, placing all the blame squarely on the shoulders of the Emperor. In turn, her “mind-tool” metaphor also implies that the population she governs – and by extension the entire population of the Empire – is to be shaped and molded by the Emperor’s tools in order to fully manifest his vision of Empire. Or, to be more blunt, in the cause of Empire there are never innocents, and the death (or enslavement, or oppression) of the people in the name of Empire is always justified. In this sense, the question Ssaria asks about her moral culpability is not only irrelevant but meaningless, the only morality that matters is the morality of the Emperor. 

This being the case, it is little surprise that Ssaria states that the answer to the question “doesn’t matter.” The question was always rhetorical. “I care little for my reputation in the streets,” the Moff pointedly admits, hardly a surprise or even a necessary statement. Obviously she doesn’t care about her reputation in the streets. Moff Ssaria doesn’t serve the people, and she certainly doesn’t answer to them. 

Lando Loiters in a Marketplace

In my last post – The Force Awakens Without Lando – I noted my disappointment that Lando Calrissian did not make an appearance in The Force Awakens while the other main characters from the Original Trilogy were included. I’m not going to rehash that entire post here, but I would encourage you to check it out if you haven’t done so. I will point out that in the post I acknowledged that The Force Awakens was a good movie even though Calrissian was missing from it. And besides, I am hopeful that he will be appearing in Episode VIII and/or IX.

So why, might one ask, am I discussing Lando once again? Is there more to be said about his absence from The Force Awakens? No, not really. Instead, I wanted to extend the conversation on Lando by turning to the 30-year period of time between Return of the Jedi and The Force Awakens. So far, only a handful of stories have taken shape (across various mediums) which have begun to populate this New Republic/Rise of the First Order era. And yet, of those stories that have begun popping up, two characters in particular have been noticeably absent from this era: Luke Skywalker and (you guessed it) Lando Calrissian.

A while back, a guest post from Michael Miller considered Luke’s absence from this era of stories, and I definitely think you should check out what Michael had to say. In the meantime, I’ll cut right to the chase: I find it incredibly odd and definitely confusing that Lando has been such an incredibly minor – and at times blatantly absent – character in the this particular era of the Star Wars timeline. Now, I say this with the full awareness that Lando has popped up in a few post-Endor stories (I’ll come back to these momentarily). Plus, it’s important to note that Lando has been given a great(er) deal of attention in stories that take place before Return of the Jedi. Notably, in the show Star Wars Rebels, Calrissian has made a couple of fun cameos and Lando was the main character in a five-part Marvel comic series aptly named Lando. In fact, I would be remiss if I failed to mention that the Lando series was one of my favorite story-arcs added to the Disney canon, perfectly capturing Lando’s personality, vocabulary, demeanor, and overall style.

Yet, even though Lando is the star of his own comic series and has a spattering of appearances on Rebels, I am left to wonder why he is not a more noticeable and active presence in the stories unfolding in the weeks/months/years following the Battle of Endor. Like I said, he has shown up here and there, but these moments are few in number and relatively shallow.

For example, in Claudia Gray’s novel Bloodline, set 24 years after the events of Return of the Jedi, Lando sends a message of support to Leia as she deals with the fallout of the Galactic Senate learning that she is the daughter of Darth Vader. A kind gesture on Lando’s part, to be sure, but nothing he actually says in the message is detailed, nor does he factor into the novel in any other way. 

In the four-part Shattered Empire comic series, set in immediate aftermath of the Battle of Endor, Lando actually appears in Issue #001 and #003. In Issue #001, Lando participates in the battle (flying the Millennium Falcon) and is present for the celebration which immediately follows the Rebel victory, chatting it up with Han Solo and other soldiers. Nothing new or surprising there. On the other hand, in Issue #003, Calrissian leads a New Republic into the Battle over Naboo, stopping the Empire’s operation to destroy the planet. Pretty awesome, I have to admit. Besides, it makes perfect sense that in the days, weeks and months after the victory at Endor, Lando would continue to serve as General in the Rebellion-turned-New Republic. However, his very next chronological appearance on the Star Wars timeline makes a lot less sense…

battle-over-naboo-2
General Calrissian takes command of the Battle over Naboo.
Photo Credit – Star Wars: Shattered Empire, Part III

In July 2016, Lando was part of an update to the game Star Wars: Uprising. While I eagerly welcomed his addition to the game, hoping that his arrival would add a dynamic new layer to the game plot/story, my enthusiasm quickly turned to utter confusion and disappointment. Allow me to explain. When one initially meets with Lando in the Longstar Marketplace on the planet Burnin Konn, Lando lays out his profitable reasons for sneaking into the Anoat sector (which serves as the location for the game and is under Imperial blockade) and is willing to cut you in on the deal. In turn, Lando gives you a job to raid the Imperial base on Nar Hypa, a moon orbiting the planet Mataou, a mission which yields some basic materials, credits, and trophies (which can be used to purchase other goods). Excited to discover what would come after my first “Lando Job,” I quickly became discouraged when I realized Lando was not going to immediately send me on another run. Surely, I figured, if I waited a day a new mission would be ready for me…and I was right! Logging into the game a day later, I was greeted by an in-game message that “Lando has a job for you.” I eagerly scooted over to the Longstar Marketplace, sought out Lando, and was presented with the EXACT SAME MISSION! The same map, Imperial forces spread out in the same places, and a similar payout. Since Lando was introduced into Uprising, his “jobs” are always the same. And, to make things even more ridiculous, Lando just keeps standing around the Longstar Marketplace. One would presume that at some point he’d make his way to the Carbon Score Cantina… 

landomission
The “Lando Mission” description.
Photo Credit – Star Wars: Uprising

Now, unless one counts some credits and a handful of in-game material as meaningful, Lando’s presence in Uprising is, to put it bluntly, entirely pointless. That is, it is pointless as of right now. While Lando’s inclusion in Uprising currently lacks any significant purpose, I am hoping that his role in the game will be expanded, especially considering the game is set in the days/weeks/months following the Battle of Endor. In short, since a (former?) Rebel/New Republic General was able to infiltrate the Imperial blockade of the Anoat sector, making his way to Burnin Konn, one would think (and hope!) that he would have plans to provide aid to the forces fighting Imperial oppression in the sector. Of course, Lando might also end up indefinitely loitering in Longstar Marketplace, his presence having no outward effect on the overall goal of breaking the Empire’s blockade and freeing the sector. Honestly, at this point, who knows what will happen with Lando in the Anoat sector.

Then again, who knows when or how Lando will show up again in a post-Endor story. I’ll be sure to update this post the next time he does.


Addition: On September 22, 2016, the game developers of Star Wars: Uprising announced that Uprising will permanently shut down in November 2016. As someone who consistently played the game since it came out, I am naturally disappointed although not surprised. The game failed to live up to a number of expectations, and while I enjoyed the lore which it added to the rich Star Wars canon, game play consistently fell short, particularly given its repetitive nature which I detailed (in part) with the “Lando Missions.” 

In light of this development, I am left wondering what this will mean for Lando Calrissian, Perhaps, even though Uprising is shutting down, a novel or comic will be written that completes the game’s primary story – the liberation of the Anoat sector – with Lando taking on a larger, more central role. Or, perhaps he will simply be stuck in limbo, continuing to stand around the Longstar Marketplace on Burnin Konn while the New Republic defeats the remnants of the Empire at Jakku. I suppose only time – and more stories – will tell what Lando’s role will end up being. 

The Force Awakens Without Lando

Admittedly, I was disappointed that Lando Calrissian, our favorite smooth-talking “galactic entrepreneur,” was left out of The Force Awakens. While arguments in defense of his absence have typically revolved around that fact that he was not an “original” character in the Original Trilogy, I have consistently felt that this argument is flawed. True, Lando was not in A New Hope and was only introduced at the outset of the Third Act in The Empire Strikes Back. But from his first appearance as Baron Administrator of Cloud City and onward, Lando Calrissian (portrayed by Billy Dee Williams) was elevated to “origial character” status, playing a critical role in the major events which unfold in the remainder of Original Trilogy.

This being the case, it’s especially important to remember (as if one could really forget) that Lando not only commanded the Rebel Starfighter squadrons during The Battle of Endor, but that he also flew the Millennium Falcon into the superstructure of the Second Death Star and (with the help of X-Wing pilot Wedge Antilles) destroyed the battle station. So sure, Lando wasn’t an “original” Original Trilogy character, but his actions – culminating in his heroics in Return of the Jedi – absolutely established him as a character equal in importance and stature with R2-D2, C-3PO, Princess Leia, Luke Skywalker, Chewbacca, and Han Solo. The iconic last scene in Return of the Jedi, which includes each of these heroes, as well as Lando, is visual proof of this obvious fact (see the featured image above). 

Further, the “not an original character” argument also falls short because Admiral Ackbar and Nien Nunb, both secondary characters introduced in Return of the Jedi, were in The Force Awakens. While it is pretty damn awesome that Ackbar and Nunb are in the film, it is none-the-less perplexing that Lando was left out while they were not. In fact, this is even more perplexing when one remembers (again, not that one could forget) that Nien Nunb was Lando’s co-pilot during The Battle of Endor. His co-pilot!!!

Lando and Nien
Lando and Nien Nunb in the cockpit of the Millennium Falcon.
Photo Credit – Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

Now, in stating, albeit briefly, why I think this particular argument for Lando’s absence is flawed, I also have to acknowledge that after watching The Force Awakens, I don’t really think Lando could have fit into the movie all that easily. It is certainly conceivable, for example, that he would be hanging out at Maz Kanata’s Castle on Takodana, but had he been there when Han, Finn, and Rey enter, his presence would have taken away from our introduction to Maz Kanata. And, had he been a member of the Resistance high command on D’Qar, his presence may have felt much more like a basic cameo, just one voice among many offering insight into the battle against the First Order.

These two possibilities are certainly not the only spots Lando could have appeared. However, I don’t really find it necessary to speculate on every moment Calrissian could have popped up in The Force Awakens. Instead, I’d much rather note that these and many other scenes could have accommodated Lando and his unique, out-going personality, but in doing so the scenes – and by extension the film – would have needed to be fundamentally altered to make his appearance meaningful. Certainly, writer/director J.J. Abrams might have been able to find a way to do this, perhaps installing General Calrissian into the Resistance and putting him center-stage to determine the attack plan against Starkiller Base. Yet, for whatever reason(s), Abrams chose not to include Lando, and again, while I’m disappointed by Lando’s absence, I think the movie Abrams made is a good one even without the “old smoothie.”

Besides, with Episode VII in the books, we must now look toward Episode VIII and IX for Calrissian to make another glorious onscreen appearance. And, even though the IMDB page for Episode VIII does not list Billy Dee Williams as part of the cast, I can certainly imagine a scenario in which Lando’s inclusion hidden until the last possible moment. In fact, I would be quite pleased to go into the film unsure if Calrissian was to appear, only to find out he IS in the movie.

Granted, there is the possibility that Lando will not be in Episode VIII (or even IX), and if this is the case my disappointment is gonna quickly morph into outright anger…and I have a feeling I won’t be the only Star Wars fan feeling that anger.


Check out my follow-up to this piece: Lando Loiters in a Marketplace

Driving (Flying) into a Tunnel (the Second Death Star)

“I’m going in.” – Wedge Antilles

“Here goes nothing.” – Lando Calrissian

It has been a hella crazy week for Star Wars fans. A Han Solo film was announced, the novel Dark Disciple was published, the first issue in the Lando comic series was released, and San Diego Comic Con is giving us even more Star Wars insanity like the release of the First Order Stormtrooper action figure from The Force Awakens! Plus, yours truly announced the upcoming Ewok Week I will be doing later this summer. Yahtzee, the awesome just keeps rolling on and on!

For today’s post, though, I wanted to keep things on the lighter side. I did a lot of pretty heavy mental lifting with my series on The Rule of Two and my brain has not fully recovered. Well, that and I just moved to Alexandria, VA from Pittsburgh, PA and I am exhausted. Needless to say, sitting here writing something that isn’t too dense is a nice reprieve from the shenanigans of moving.

In a fun twist, though, my idea for today’s post is a result of the move, or rather, the drive from Pittsburgh to Alexandria.

View looking out of the Falcon's cockpit - Wedge Antilles (X-Wing) and Jake Farrell (A-Wing)  Photo Credit - Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

View looking out of the Falcon’s cockpit – Wedge Antilles (X-Wing) and Jake Farrell (A-Wing)
Photo Credit – Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

You see, on the Pennsylvania Turnpike, there is a pretty lengthy tunnel called the Allegheny Tunnel which cuts through a mountain in the Appalachians. As I sped 70mph towards the tunnel, I instinctively flipped a switch in my brain and, entering the tunnel, belted out The Battle of Endor III – Medley from the Return of the Jedi soundtrack. Can’t recall what the Third Medley is? I got ya covered: click HERE and listen for a second. I will wait for you to get back…

…alright, welcome back.

Alright, so, that is the music that plays when Wedge Antilles (in his X-Wing) and Lando Calrissian (in the Millennium Falcon) fly into the super structure of the Second Death Star. Chances are you already knew that, and chances are that if you have watched Return of the Jedi enough times, when you have driven into a tunnel, you have also belted out this particular Medley.

Or, maybe, you have actually turned on the Return of the Jedi soundtrack and listened to the Medley as you drove through a tunnel. If my RotJ soundtrack had been in the car with me, I would have done that too (I only had The Empire Strikes Back with me on this particular trip).

Now, it is one thing to just hum the tune, or belt it out, or put on the soundtrack. I mean, I am sitting here humming along to the Medley which is playing in the background as I type. However, it is entirely different to hum it, or belt it out, or put on the soundtrack to RotJ when you drive into a tunnel because it essentially means you are pretending to participate in the Battle of Endor.

Yeah, I am not ashamed to say that I imagine that I am flying into the superstructure of the Second Death Star when I drive into tunnels. But the thing is I do it entirely on instinct. It is built into my psyche at this point. If I ever drive into a tunnel and I don’t hum the tune, or belt it out, or put the RotJ soundtrack on I feel like something is wrong.

Oh, and to make tunnel driving even more awesome, I typically quote Wedge and Lando as I drive into and through a tunnel, all of which culminates with the “YEEEEEHAAAAW” as I fly, whoops, I mean drive out the other side.

Nien Nunb Photo Credit - Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

Nien Nunb
Photo Credit – Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

Really, what would make the tunnel driving even more epic is if I had someone sitting next to me willing to play the part of Nien Nunb. But they will have to learn Sullustese. I mean, it would be pretty ridiculous for someone to pretend to be Nien and for them not to learn Sullustese!!! Hahaha how silly, Nien Nunb speaking Basic!

Anywho, I have some pretty awesome stuff planned for the coming weeks (including my take on what a Yoda film AND a Kenobi film, respectively, could/should look like), but until then, let me know if A) if you have ever had a similar tunnel-driving experience(s) as the one I have described and B) if you find yourself in other situations belting out a Star Wars tune or quoting Star Wars. Leave a comment and share the love!